What Is Spiritual Direction? A Catholic Explanation

The practice goes by several names. The Congregation for the Clergy's 2011 document on the subject uses spiritual counsel, spiritual direction and spiritual accompaniment more or less interchangeably, and notes that the thing itself has existed in the Church under different names from the beginning. ²

Its purpose is discernment. The same document puts the principal aim as recognizing the signs of God’s will in a person’s vocation, prayer, daily life and mission. ² It adds that spiritual direction is not simply a doctrinal consultation, because it concerns a person’s relationship with Christ and not only what they know about him. ² And it insists, as the spiritual masters always have, that the real director is the Holy Spirit, while the person being directed keeps their own responsibility and initiative. ²

Direction can be steady or occasional. The Church recognizes direction that is habitual, periodic, or occasional, around a single decision or crisis. ²

The oldest form of the practice is found among the monks of the Egyptian desert. John Cassian, who sought them out and wrote down their teaching, recorded Abba Moses teaching that discretion, the ability to tell good from evil in one’s own thoughts, is learned through humility, and that the first sign of that humility is to bring everything, thoughts as well as deeds, to the elders instead of trusting one’s own judgment. ³ He follows it with Abba Serapion’s story of the biscuit he stole and ate in secret every night as a young monk, a habit that lost its hold the moment he said it aloud. ³ Direction still rests on that insight: a thought kept hidden has more power over us than one brought into the light.

The Rule of Saint Benedict carried this into Western monasticism. Among the tools of the spiritual life it lists is the instruction to dash evil thoughts against Christ the moment they arise and to disclose them to one’s spiritual father. ⁴ Elsewhere the Rule says that a hidden fault of the soul should be revealed only to the abbot or to a spiritual father who knows how to heal his own wounds and other people’s without exposing them. ⁴ Openness and discretion are still the heart of the practice, which is why Saint Benedict belongs in its history.

According to the Congregation for the Clergy, direction began in the monasteries of East and West, became part of the various schools of spirituality from the Middle Ages, and reached much further into ordinary Christian life in the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries, in the writings of Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross, Ignatius of Loyola, Francis de Sales and Alphonsus Liguori, among others. ²

In the Spiritual Exercises, Saint Ignatius of Loyola gave the classic description of a director’s restraint: the guide should not push the retreatant toward one state of life or another, but stand "in the centre like a balance" and "leave the Creator to act immediately with the creature." ⁵

Saint Teresa of Avila, who had good directors and bad ones, says in chapter 13 of her Life that a director should above all be prudent and experienced, and learned as well if possible, and she defends consulting learned men even when they are not themselves much given to prayer, because sound doctrine protects against illusion. ⁶ Her friend Saint John of the Cross was harder on bad directors than anyone. In the Living Flame of Love he says a director must be learned, prudent and experienced, and he reminds directors that the Holy Spirit is the principal agent and the real guide of souls, and that directors are only instruments. ⁷

Saint Francis de Sales, writing for a laywoman in the Introduction to the Devout Life, made a guide one of the first things a devout person should look for. In Part I, chapter 4, he tells her to pray for one, to deal with that person openly, and to choose carefully: Saint John of Avila had said to choose one among a thousand, "and I say among ten thousand, for there are fewer than one would think capable of this office." The guide, he adds, must be full of love, wisdom and discretion, because if any of the three is missing there is danger. ⁸

Canon law requires spiritual direction in one setting only. Every seminary must have at least one spiritual director, though seminarians remain free to go to other priests the bishop has designated; seminarians are recommended to have a director they have chosen freely and to whom they can open their conscience; and when the Church decides whether to admit a seminarian to orders or dismiss him, the opinion of his spiritual director may never be sought. ⁹ For religious, the Code tells superiors to respect their members’ freedom in the sacrament of penance and in the direction of conscience. ¹⁰ No canon obliges lay people to have a director. It is recommended to them, not required.

The Congregation for the Clergy’s The Priest, Minister of Divine Mercy (2011), subtitled An Aid for Confessors and Spiritual Directors, gives its whole second part to the subject and observes that demand for direction among the faithful is growing. ²

Pope Francis wrote about direction under the name of accompaniment. In Evangelii Gaudium (2013) he says the Church must initiate everyone, priests, religious and lay people alike, into the "art of accompaniment," that accompaniment must lead people closer to God and not become a kind of therapy that feeds self-absorption, and that it rests on patient listening and on refusing to judge another person’s standing before God. ¹¹ In Christus Vivit (2019) he repeats the synod fathers’ call to train consecrated and lay men and women to accompany young people, and quotes young people themselves saying that this role "is not and cannot be limited to priests and consecrated life." ¹²

Most of a director’s work is listening. They ask about your prayer, help you notice patterns over months that are invisible from inside a single week, and may suggest a passage of Scripture, a book or a change in how you pray. The Congregation for the Clergy lists the qualities it hopes for: a welcoming manner, patient listening, humility, prudence, discretion, and a sense of humor; it warns against authoritarianism and against the kind of paternalism that makes a person emotionally dependent. ²

A director’s authority is one of counsel, not command. ² The Church is explicit that the person being directed must take up the counsel freely and responsibly, and cannot hand their decisions to the director. ² Ignatius’ balance and John of the Cross’ reminder that the director is only an instrument say the same thing from the director’s side. ⁵⁷

What a director does not do:

• Give absolution. A priest who is your director may also hear your confession, but that is a separate act, the sacrament of penance, and not part of direction itself.
• Make your decisions for you, about a vocation, a marriage, a job, or anything else.
• Act as your religious superior. Obedience to a director is not the obedience a religious owes a superior.
• Treat mental illness, addiction or trauma. A good director will notice when something needs professional help and say so.

Direction is most organized in seminaries and religious houses, but the Church does not reserve it to them. The Congregation for the Clergy calls it a help to holiness available to the faithful irrespective of their state of life, and describes direction for lay people as a fraternal help in living their own vocation in family, work and public life, not a remedial measure for their failures. ²

People often look for a director after a return to the faith, when prayer has gone dry, before a decision about a vocation, or simply when they want to pray more seriously. There is no spiritual minimum. For decisions in particular, see What is discernment?.

A spiritual director does not have to be a priest. The Congregation for the Clergy notes that while direction was always given by monks and priests, other members of the faithful, religious and lay, have also given spiritual counsel, naming Saint Catherine of Siena as an example, and that today there are well-formed lay men and women who offer this service. ² The Apostolic Penitentiary, describing direction in 2019, speaks of a believer entrusting their conversion and sanctification to "a specific priest, consecrated or lay person." ¹³

What matters is the person’s formation, experience and faithfulness. The Church asks for sufficient knowledge of the spiritual life in theory and practice, real experience of it, and a good sense of responsibility and prudence. ² Teresa of Avila’s three qualities, prudence, experience and learning, still make a good checklist. ⁶ In seminaries and religious houses, directors are appointed; elsewhere the Church has no general license or register of spiritual directors, and the choice is yours. ⁹

GraceBook lists Catholic mentors, priests, religious and lay people, who describe their own background. It does not verify ordination, faculties or training, and it runs no background checks; every mentor signs the Mentor Agreement, undertaking to teach in accord with Scripture, Tradition and the Magisterium and to work within their competence. Your parish and diocese are the first place to ask, and the questions in Questions to ask a spiritual director apply to anyone you meet, wherever you found them.

Spiritual direction is confidential, but it is not under the seal of confession, and the difference is worth understanding.

The Apostolic Penitentiary’s 2019 note on the internal forum places spiritual direction in what canon law calls the extra-sacramental internal forum: the private sphere of conscience, outside the sacrament of penance. Because the person opens their conscience freely to the director, the note says, direction demands a real secrecy toward outsiders, grounded in each person’s right to privacy, and it describes this as only analogous to what happens in confession. ¹³ The Church backs that confidentiality in law: a seminarian’s spiritual director cannot be asked for an opinion on his ordination, and in the causes of saints the testimony of a candidate’s spiritual directors is excluded. ¹³⁹

The seal of confession is something else. It applies only to what is confessed in the sacrament, it binds the confessor absolutely, and canon law forbids him to betray a penitent in any way and for any reason. ¹⁴ The 2019 note adds that not even the penitent can release a confessor from it. ¹³ Nothing said in direction carries that sacramental protection unless it is said in confession. If you want something to be under the seal, confess it. A sensible first conversation with any director includes asking plainly how they handle confidentiality.

Confession is a sacrament in which a priest absolves your sins; direction is a conversation about your whole life with God. The two are often connected, and the Congregation for the Clergy encourages priests to offer direction outside the time of confession as well. ² Many people see one priest for confession and a different person, sometimes a lay person, for direction. For confession itself, see the guide to confession.

Counseling and therapy treat psychological suffering and are done by licensed professionals. Direction attends to the spiritual life. The two can work side by side: the Church says direction may in some cases be assisted, though never replaced, by psychological help, and that some difficulties call for professional attention that is both spiritual and psychological. ² Pope Francis puts the boundary from the other side, warning that accompaniment must not become a therapy that feeds self-absorption. ¹¹ Spiritual direction vs. therapy covers the differences in detail.

Start where Francis de Sales started: pray for a good guide. ⁸ A short prayer to the Holy Spirit, such as Come, Holy Spirit, is a good beginning. Then ask. Your parish priest may direct people himself or know who does; dioceses, retreat houses and religious communities often keep lists of directors. How to find a spiritual director goes through the options step by step.

What to expect in spiritual direction describes a first session, how often people meet and what it costs, and Questions to ask a spiritual director gives you a short list to take with you. If your parish cannot help, GraceBook’s mentor directory is one more place to look.